I failed.

7:27:00 PM

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.

So, I guess this is it. It doesn't necessarily meant the end, but I can't help but feeling disappointed... like very, very disappointed.

This evening, or to put it simply, just now, we're having selection for this kind of sport. At first, I was just trying my luck and got selected to the next round. Then, boom, it's over. It's just over. I didn't get selected. Yeah of course I'm disappointed. I know I need to realize that I won't get selected at all. Because I don't have skill, I just know the basics. But still, why am I so damn upset about it? Why it feels so hurt? Why am I crying? It's for nothing. Why does it feels like this?

Am I meant for nothing?

Sometimes I do wonder why a weak person like me could survive this world. Yes, it may sounds exagerrated but I can't help thinking about it. Sometimes I do feel useless. Like I'm up to nothing. My life is like "sit down there and just enjoy yourself, which secretly means, mind your own stupid business" rather than "go out there and make me proud". Eventhough nobody said that, but hey, my freaking mind do. I always entering my "overthinking" mode once I felt so terrible like this.

Now I come to a glum conclusion. I am suck, and yes, I know it. Period.

Funny, how negative mind works. When people try to wish me luck for the selection, it does feel like a blessing. But when I failed, it feels like an insult.

Feeling much much better now. Phew, certainly, crying does help.

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3 obliviators

  1. Hi Yoo. Take it easy. Its normal to be failed on something. Just get over it quickly okay? :*

    1. Insyaallah, I will try kak nad :)


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